Electric shocks improve your arithmetic

Now we're not saying that you should go and lick that exposed wire in the cupboard under your stairs, we're merely presenting the facts from the science bods at Oxford University who have revealed that gentle electrical stimulation to your brain can improve your ability to learn and use numbers for up to 6 months.

The scientists' findings state that when the rear of your brain is provided with a light current it stimulates greater neural activity and stimulation to the right parietal lobe, improving mathematical abilities. Stimulating the opposite side of the brain even made people worse at maths.

"I am certainly not advising people to go around giving themselves electric shocks, but we are extremely excited by the potential of our findings", said Roi Cohen Kadosh, a neuroscientist at Oxford University.

"We've shown before that we can temporarily induce dyscalculia, and now it seems we might also be able to make someone better at maths. Electrical stimulation will most likely not turn you into Albert Einstein, but if we're successful, it might be able to help some people to cope better with maths".

Now, maths skills are all well and good but that's hardly going to impress the ladies. As Napoleon Dynamite said: "Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills - like nunchuku skills, bow hunting skills and computer hacking skills".

What we need is for the scientists to find the right lobes to improve these skills. Then we'd be cooking on gas.